Brene Brown says that “when perfectionism is driving, shame is riding shotgun and fear is in the back seat.” Striving for perfection is really an attempt to hide shame, or seek approval from others. It becomes a veil that we hide under. Its the question that we hold in our psyche that says “what will people think” In this episode Brene Brown shares examples of armor that can become clues. If we catch ourselves in these situations, we can turn them around. Gossip is a biggie, we all fall into this trap. We criticize those who are putting themselves out there in an attempt to mask our own insecurities. Being Argumentative, Controlling, always apologizing, defensive, cynical. are just a few coverups for shame. We both felt an enlightened moment when Brene said that “Perfectionism is one of the most contagious types of armor. If you have it you are passing it down!” We agree that in our efforts to do better and be better, this is a trait we want to understand fully so that we can set examples of authenticity to our children and grandchildren.
Today we sit down with private investigator Brett Magleby. Brett is an experienced private investigator, supervisor, and well as a successful small business owner. Brett received his Bachelor of Arts in Political Science and Public Administration from the University of Utah. He joined Salt Lake County Sheriff’s Office in 1990 and later joined the Unified Police Department. In over 24 years of public service, Brett held numerous prestigious positions with his tenure as a Law enforcement officer specializing in units dealing with high profile criminal investigations involving gangs and serious youth offenders. Brett was the founding member of the Salt Lake County Gang Suppression Unit and developed implemented tracking and identification policy and procedures.
Brett was the lead private investigator in our search when Paul went missing. We quickly learned that he would be so much more than our detective. Brett opens up about his personal life and challenges as a single father. He shares how drug addiction has affected his life and shares so much wisdom about how to recover from the most painful times. We never know what life will ask us to endure. The real goal is to find the gifts hidden deep in our shadows, and move towards healing and ultimately Joy!
Brett became our foundation. His trials bestowed wisdom and gentleness that was a healing balm as we were surviving on adrenaline. He helped us navigate the emotions and focus on the essential details. He was able to forge relationships of cooperation with homicide detectives and authorities.
When you see how Brett has stepped up as a single father, you can’t help but admire and honor him. Hearing his enlightened message is another validation of hope. We can see that rising above our pain is possible. We can grow a new life around tragedy and become space holders for those just starting their journey.
We want to wish all fathers, husbands, brothers, uncles, grandfathers a day full of honor. We also recognize that not everyone finds holidays like these joyful. That’s ok too. We hope hearing from Brett will shine a light on your sadness, bring hope to your struggle and peace to your heart. His story also offers encouragement, hope, and healing. He is indeed an example of delivering a strong sense of badassery to a case and providing soothing comfort when the sky is raining hell, and the ground is crumbling underneath you.
Iceland is the land of fire and Ice. Large chunks of ice break from the glacier and begin a journey to the sea. These icebergs make their way from a lake where they connect with the violent ocean waves. From there they are broken apart in the frigid sea. Tossed and tumbled polished and refined. And then at the perfect moment, they are spit onto the volcanic black sand beach. The magic of these ice diamonds glistening against the contrast of the black beach takes your breath away. The story of conflict plays out so perfectly here. We can see the entire journey unfold and watch aspects of a glacier transform into the most remarkable diamonds. Life offers us the same transformation. We have to survive the violent storms of the sea, to change form and ultimately find ourselves back on land with a new perspective and focus.
If you ever find yourself in need of Private Investigative services, we give Brett’s group a gold seal stamp of approval. They bring multiple talents to the table. From hostage negotiation, FBI training, cyber security, SWAT operations, and as you can see from listening to Brett, a sense of compassion that is unparalleled.
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